Tag Archives: notes

At the centre of the storm

I spent a few hours standing at the centre of my rooftop, observing the thunderstorm that hit me from right and left, sometimes with an unprecedented anguish and sometimes how desperate love touches; childlike. I stood there letting my skin soak whatever it could- of the rain that has made my heart half sentimental, as it is.

Nobody ever taught me that when it rains, I would feel good, I would feel nostalgic. Some of my bruises would come alive and some would be washed off. I just fell in love with the rain in the most conventional manner. I gazed at it, I felt it and I couldn’t make sense of the blooming earth without a few drops of rain dancing around it.

Maybe, I am trying to say that in that thunderstorm, observing it, soaking it and believing in it- I realised it was a lot of my life. A lull and a song, paralleled, flowing in various directions​ but just for the same purpose: to be a life, a love, a freedom.

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Silence.

Some silences you are born with, some you learn, some are forced, some you get habitual of. But the worst silence is the one, which you give birth to; with a thought that it would hide you from this world, might protect you. But then, bit by bit, blood by blood, flesh by flesh it begins to tear you, question you and consume you. This silence then grows in search of your voice but all it gets is silence. It multiplies to fill you with empty holes punched hard through you. Gradually, your child becomes your ruler and then your destroyer. There will be moments when you would try to kill it but all it would take is great courage to kill what your soul now bears. This silence has now become a weapon of self consumption.
~P